Writing our memoir (A Rendezvous to Remember) about our early days has been a 3-D roller-coaster ride: breath-taking, but some of the twists and turns left us bruised and aching, like my decision to marry against my parents’ wishes.
Fortunately, the winds of time sand-blasted the rough edges of that disagreement but never erased the deep love within our extended family, and I still have warm memories of my mom cuddling me as she read bedtime stories, serving up fresh-baked bread when I returned from school, and dashing off for another shopping adventure—always sharing jokes, her brown eyes sparkling.
And now, on this Mothers Day, I look at Mom’s photo and long for a good old-fashioned mother-daughter talk. Sadly, our long-ago talks centered too much on “me,” not enough on Mom. I gnash my teeth now at the many questions, large and small, I never thought to ask my mom about herself, like . . .
- What were your best memories from high school and college?
- What are the most important things you learned growing up, and from whom?
- What were your best accomplishments in your professional life?
- What were your best memories about former boyfriends?
- How did you finally decide that Dad was “the one”?
- What did your folks say when you told them you had married Dad?
- What did you learn about Dad that you didn’t know when you got married?
- What was your love life like? (It’s okay. I’m a grownup now.)
- What are the best adventures you and Dad had together?
- And, Mom, tell me, how was YOUR day today?
How about you, my website visitors? What questions would YOU want to ask your mom?
What questions have you asked that have yielded the best talks?
—Ann